|Goodbye My Love|
|Written||October 26, 2009|
|No. of Chapters||4|
|Completed||October 27, 2009|
|Link||Goodbye My Love|
|Warnings||This may contain spoilers.|
Goodbye My Love is a fanfiction written and published on FanFiction.Net by Mutt13.
Kelly is moving away and she will have to be in a long distance relationship with Kenny. Meanwhile, Cartman gets Butters' help with McDonalds being shut down by the health department. Will Kenny and Kelly still be able to carry on a relationship? Will Cartman be able to save his restaurant? Or will they both have to spend the rest of their lives wallowing in vain over what they've lost.
The story starts with Kenny in his home with his brother and sister watching TV and his mom comes in and starts yelling at them for using up the electricity. The phone rings and Kenny gets it. The person calling is Kelly and she is telling him some sad news about how she is going to be moving away tomorrow. A very shocked and devastated Kenny asks her if they will still be able to date but she just sits still for a while and says she doesn't know.
Kyle and Stan are at the bus stop and Stan is talking about how things for him have been kind of boring and lazy for him lately. Kyle tells him that once Cartman comes up, it will all be over. Just then he comes up just like he said and he is terrified and freaking out. He tells them about how his favorite restaurant McDonalds is being shut down by the health department in Colorado. Stan and Kyle ignore him and think its for the best that all that fatty food will stop him from being obese. Kenny comes up and tells them the news. Stan and Kyle feel sad for him and Cartman is getting mad at them for not listening to him. Stan and Kyle offer to help him with his problems with Kelly. Cartman runs off in rage over his problems being neglected and gets Butters to help him instead. Stan and Kyle talk to him about it and Kenny starts crying because of how sad this is for him.
At South Park Elementary, Butters is at his locker and Cartman comes up asking for his help. He tells him that McDonalds is being shut down by the health department and he needs his help to get it to come back. Butters feels a little let down by the fact that McDonalds but not as freaked out as Cartman. He accepts to help him. Stan and Kyle come up to them with Kenny who is still crying and ask Cartman for suggestions on what to do to solve his problems. Cartman just screams for them to help him with his problems about how he is going to lose his one true love. He tells Kenny he has no idea how bad that feels and Kenny just looks at him like he's a complete idiot. Kyle states that Cartman is gay for McDonalds.
At McDonalds Cartman and Butters go up. Cartman asks why it's being shut down and a guy there tells him because the food is too unhealthy and is causing obesity to everyone and tells them that fortunately, there may be a way to stop them. The only way to get them to stop is for them to prove McDonalds is healthy and acceptable for human consumption. Cartman says that is too hard of a thing to do and they think of another way. He will gather around every fat person in the world and they will start a protest to make them keep McDonalds alive.
Stan talks to his girlfriend Wendy about Kenny and asks for her to help him understand how he will still be okay even after Kelly leaves. Wendy says that long distance relationships are not all that bad and that they can just face time each other all the time. Kenny says that he can't do that because he's too poor and doesn't have the money to pay for the wifi. Wendy keeps trying to convince him of things but he always has a thing that means the reason why he can't do it. Then they decide to make him go up to Kelly herself to talk it over. Kenny and Kelly sit together at lunch and they talk about how they can stay in touch because they are not ready to break up. They can't think of a way for them to be together after she moves. They think that they will just have to deal with the move and break up. Kenny and Kelly sink into a depression.
Cartman is gathering around fat people everywhere and teaching them like an army of how they will not accept McDonalds falling down. How they will fight for their rights. But the fat people are too lazy to fight for their rights and just start laying down and sleeping. Cartman sinks into a depression too and walks off and starts singing a sad song of how he's losing his true love. Kenny goes into his room and takes off his good and starts singing too. Cartman is in his room and the two of them start singing in a duo of how their love is going to go away from them. Cartman is in his bed crying and so is Kenny in his bed. Suddenly, they both get struck with an idea.
Cartman's idea is to make Butters get fat so that he will be able to help him fight for McDonalds. Cartman trains Butters to make himself fat like him.
Kenny's idea is to get a job of his own to make more money for his relationship with Kelly. Kenny gets a job at McDonalds on its last day of business.
Cartman finds himself with a humongous Butters who will be perfect for destroying the health department and saving McDonalds and Kenny finds himself with a measly amount of money that will never cover his wifi and electricity. Butters goes up like a dinosaur and terrifies everyone in the town as if he is a monster. He goes up to McDonalds and sees the people about to tear it down and runs up to destroy them, but he misses and rolls down the hill and crushes and kills and destroys everything in his path. Kenny is helping Kelly get all her stuff into the car and Butters comes rolling past. The health department decide that so much more damage was caused without McDonalds that was caused with McDonalds and they decide not to tear it down. It turns out, the only reason Kelly's parents were going to move was because McDonalds was being shut down in their area and they could not live without it. Now that it's been saved. They won't need to move.
In the end, Cartman, Kyle, Stan, Kenny, and Kelly are all happily eating at McDonalds and everything seems to be working out perfectly for them until Kyle remembers about Butters. Butters is seen still rolling until he gets to the border of the land and goes into the ocean. He stops in there and he asks where he is and is answered by a fat named girl at a nude beach of obese naked girls that he's right where he belongs. McDonald food is being passed out and they all start having a good time partying naked and eating McDonalds food too.
- Kenny McCormick
- Eric Cartman
- Butters Scotch
- Stan Marsh
- Kyle Broflovski
- Health Department
- Kelly's Mom
- Kelly's Dad
- Wendy Testaburger
- Kenny's Mom
- Kevin McCormick (Non-Speaking)
- Karen McCormick (Non-Speaking)
- Kenny's Dad (Offscreen Cameo)
- Fat Naked Girls
- Terence (Pictured)
- Phillip (Pictured)